For some there are two types of writing. There is the sort of writing that constitutes the creation of actual literature, the writing of novels, short stories, plays, poetry, perhaps even newspaper articles and depending on how broad one wants to go, blog posts, twitter updates, and there’s this other sort of “writing” a dark, soulless thing known as screenwriting, which lacks all literary merit and is the sign of a seriously depraved individual.
OK, perhaps I exaggerate, but there is a pretty dark view of Hollywood writing held by many who revere the more traditional forms of writing in general. How appropriate then that the most recent screenwriting book I read is The Devil’s Guide to Hollywood: the Screenwriter as God by Joe Eszterhas, which is as dark and cynical a portrait of screenwriting as one could hope for written by someone who has made a killing in this business. The book pretty much lacks the bright optimism that infects so many books on the subject of writing and yet still manages to be completely inspiring.
Here are some things I learned while reading The Devil’s Guide to Hollywood:
“In 1991, during the Gulf War, Iraqi airplanes dropped leaflets on our troops that said, ‘Your wives are back at home having sex with Bart Simpson and Burt Reynolds.’”
George Foreman’s literary advice: “Writers used to give us character but now too many writers have abandoned character.”
Critics “want to kill you, rape your wife, and eat your children.” Critics bash screenwriters because they are jealous of screenwriters and because they don’t have to be nice to you in order to get an interview, because no one wants to read an interview with a screenwriter anyway.
Actually just about every page of this book was filled with useful little gems, as well as even more funny bits. For me I am beginning to think about making a deal with the devil, or at least getting back to that screenplay of mine.
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